Today is the Feast day of Saint James

Prayer to the Holy Spitit
Come Holy Spitit
fill my heart with you holy gifts.
Let My Weakness Be Penetrated With Your
strength this very day that I may fulfill all the
duties of my state conscientiously, that I may do what is right and just.
Let My Charity Be Such As To Offend No One
and hurt no one's feelings; so generous as to pardon sincerely any wrong done to me.
Assist Me, O Holy Spirit,
in all my trials of life, enlighten me in my ignorance, advise me in my doubts, strengthen me in my weakness, help me in all my needs, protect me in temptations and console me in afflictions.
Graciously Hear Me, O Holy Spirit,
and pour Your light into my heart, my soul and my mind.
Assist Me To Live A Holy Life And Grow In goodness and grace. Amen.
Fr.Larry Hess

I have been telling you the story of my son and our journey with his illness. I don't really like the term illness because I don't think of it as something that comes as an uninvited guest into your life like a cold or cancer. Whatever this is, it is apart of him that can no sooner be cut out than an internal organ. No it is not an illness any more than Down syndrom is an illness. My third child who is also a son was talking to me last night about the effect his brother has had on him in the past and in the present. He told me that he can understand him better than anyone that it has also been a gauge as to how he has come to understand the rest of the world and relate to people. This can either be a good thing or a bad thing it all depends on what kind of a mood he is in. I asked him if he thought his brother was getting better or if he was the same or worse. He said that it doesn't really change its just him isn't it always the same. He also added that he thought he had developed some of the traits of a schizophrenic because he had spent so much time with his brother over the years. I feel that way too I said. Sometimes I'm not sure what is real and what isn't. I'm not saying that he is contagious that would be absurd what I am saying is that all the time I spend in dealing with him sometimes I become confused between his reality and mine. He was telling me how he wanted to commit suicide when he was in middle-school and high-school and how he worked it out and got his life back on track. I asked him why he did not come and talk to me about what was going on? That I could have helped with some of it. He told me I had more than I could handle with his brother. I could feel my heart twist inside my chest to think that I could have lost a child and spent the rest of my life wondering what went wrong. But as he talked about why he wanted to die I heard a lot of self loathing and frustration that he didn't think anyone would understand or he didn't stop to think about what it would do to the rest of the family we were not a concern because he was so wrapped up in his own misery. How many times have I felt like that? How many times have I been so involved with my own pain that I could not see what it was doing to those around me? We talked until four am and then there was nothing left to say for the time being so we just said good night. This is not the first time I have had to digest this information from him and it won't be the last I just hope that I can be there again for him.
Remember Saint Monica
Come Holy Spirt, Come by means of your powerful intercessor the Immaculate Heart of Mary.
Amen.